Do You Respect Your Partners Conflict Style?
Conflict resolution is a part of life and happens to people in different ways. We all process and deal with conflict differently. Some people encounter a problem and fly off the handle. Others, take a beat and use that time to process, dissect and digest what has just occurred.
Who has the better way of handling disputes? Honestly, there is no right or wrong answer. As people, we all process differently and since our personalities are not the same, our ways of handling disagreements differ.
Take this example:
A couple is disagreeing about which set of parents to visit for the holidays. Up until now, they have never really planned it out, they just went with it. However, this year 1 of the two are not in agreement. What do they do?
After going back and forth about it they cannot seem to come to a mutual agreement. They start to use some choice words and still have not come to a resolution.
Tasha is the type to hash out the disagreement right then and there. No waiting to think it over and revisit the subject later. We are going to talk about this now! Tonight! We are not going to bed without figuring this out is Tasha’s point of view.
Corey is the type to take in the information, think about it and process everything. Talk about the dispute the next day. So, you can imagine that Tasha wants to have nothing to do with waiting. This in itself creates more tension because she wants to talk about it now.
Do you think Tasha should just respect the fact that Corey is not ready to discuss it now. If being continually pushed, Corey might say some things that he cannot come back from. So, is it best that Tasha gives him the time and space to figure this out? Or should Corey talk to Tasha now?
In the meantime, Tasha has been waiting and now decides that she no longer cares to discuss it. Corey is livid at this point because he feels like he has had the chance to think it over and now ready to discuss but Tasha is no longer interested?!?!
What do you think? Do you respect your partners conflict style? How do you come to common ground and find a happy ending?
Thank you for reading! 
Image credit: Tumisu from Pixabay
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5 replies on “Can You Answer This? Do You Respect Your Partners Conflict Style?”
I ve been in this situation many times and I think the common ground is to both set a date and time together to talk about sometimes what you may talk about might not be important to the next person be clear on what the discussion is going to be doing tic for tac makes matters worse kin folk lol lol
Thank you, Louis! This is a good approach to two people who may not have the same conflict style. And 2 wrongs don’t make a right and it always makes things worse. Thank you for sharing!
We are mostly on the same page
Sadje, that is great! It helps when both people can solve problems together.
I fully agree my friend