Thought of the Day
“Hate is too great a burden to bear. Hate injures the hater more than the hated. “-Coretta Scott King
Life is so precious. Why live with hatred in your heart?!
Stay well and be blessed
Categories
Category: Self Awareness
Do You Respect Your Partners Conflict Style?
Conflict resolution is a part of life and happens to people in different ways. We all process and deal with conflict differently. Some people encounter a problem and fly off the handle. Others, take a beat and use that time to process, dissect and digest what has just occurred.
Who has the better way of handling disputes? Honestly, there is no right or wrong answer. As people, we all process differently and since our personalities are not the same, our ways of handling disagreements differ.
Take this example:
A couple is disagreeing about which set of parents to visit for the holidays. Up until now, they have never really planned it out, they just went with it. However, this year 1 of the two are not in agreement. What do they do?
After going back and forth about it they cannot seem to come to a mutual agreement. They start to use some choice words and still have not come to a resolution.
Tasha is the type to hash out the disagreement right then and there. No waiting to think it over and revisit the subject later. We are going to talk about this now! Tonight! We are not going to bed without figuring this out is Tasha’s point of view.
Corey is the type to take in the information, think about it and process everything. Talk about the dispute the next day. So, you can imagine that Tasha wants to have nothing to do with waiting. This in itself creates more tension because she wants to talk about it now.
Do you think Tasha should just respect the fact that Corey is not ready to discuss it now. If being continually pushed, Corey might say some things that he cannot come back from. So, is it best that Tasha gives him the time and space to figure this out? Or should Corey talk to Tasha now?
In the meantime, Tasha has been waiting and now decides that she no longer cares to discuss it. Corey is livid at this point because he feels like he has had the chance to think it over and now ready to discuss but Tasha is no longer interested?!?!
What do you think? Do you respect your partners conflict style? How do you come to common ground and find a happy ending?
Thank you for reading!
Categories
Balance My Lunch #2
Balance My Lunch
What can be added or taken away from this lunch to make it healthier?
Featured lunch
Fried wing dings
Green beans
Yellow rice
Can you answer this? What is your networking style?
Do you prefer to network in person or online? Maybe a combination of the two is more like it. Of course, the more connections you make the more opportunities present themselves.
Are you a people person who prefers the more personal one-on-one approach? Some people find that the in person strategy is most effective because you can look at the person you are speaking with and gauge from their response, if they are interested in your collaboration or not. Another clue would be their energy. The person may not seem enthusiastic in what you are saying and unsure about how to let you down easily or relay the disinterest.
On the other hand, some people find great success in networking online. I think it depends on the kind or business you have and are trying to grow. Building your brand and networking online gives you a reach of people that in-person networking cannot achieve. The trick is making sure to align with people interested and building in your field of interest.
So, what is your networking style?
As always, thank you for reading! Stay well and be blessed
Categories
The Salon Chair
In the salon chair
Close your eyes let your cares fly
Fly far away and down the drain
Tears chasing thoughts
Thoughts undealt with for years
So relaxed in the salon chair
Not caring who hears
Hears you release pain, regret, disappointment,
Hurt, dreams unfulfilled
Like water, let it flow freely down your cheek
After all who will notice
In the salon chair, scalp being massaged
Forgetting where you are you begin confessional
Spilling details most dear to your heart
In hopes that those hands can relate
The hands of the person in your proximity
Letting you be free with your truths
She or he listens with understanding
Empathy, caring and non-judgement
They know this is your time
Time to let your hair down
Relax, talk, cry, listen
In the salon chair
Where best kept secrets are kept
Never revealing the tears that wept
The smiles, the laughs, the shared tea
Moments at the salon that involve three
The chair the stylist and me
No other entity compares
In the salon chair
Like therapy in many ways
Going in one way and leaving another
Altered both emotionally and physically
Hair looking fresh to death
Feeling and looking your best
You smile and your strut beams confidence
Suddenly you remember to keep your head up
Image by Michelle Raponi from Pixabay
PSA- Who are “They”? asks the questions about how society puts a certain demographic of people in the same group. The talk in this post is not my usual content but I felt the need to speak on this topic. I have been seeing and hearing people on various platforms discussing this, and it piqued my interest.
Are black men being judged unfairly? Are they being crucified by public opinion? What do you think? Is there some magical potion or spell on black men being cast by “They”? Just curious about your thoughts on the subject. Please share your perspective.
As always, thank you for watching! 
Categories
Mind Your Words
Ever wonder if your words leave a lasting impression on people? The short answer is, yes. So, it is with this video message I am talking about how to mind your words. Be mindful of how you speak to others. If you approach someone in a disrespectful or condescending manner, you most likely will not get the result you want. Words heal and they can hurt.
As always, thank you for stopping by! Stay well and be blessed 
Unglue and Unsew
The article today, titled The Unveiling of You. No More Thread, No More Glue is strictly for women who are frustrated in the dating game. They are looking to make a romantic connection but are feeling left out. The ones who feel like they should receive all the attention. The women who feel that they are attractive but are being passed over for simple, plain looking women who do not measure up, in their opinion. Let me explain.
If you are trying to make a meaningful connection, one of the things to do is to distinguish yourself from everyone else. Enhancements we add to our overall look can determine whether we blend in or stand out in the crowd. Wondering why men pass right by you? It might be because you look exactly the same as every other woman in the room. Present yourself in a way that is different from the others.
Try surveying the room and see if you are looking at the same image as yourself, do you wonder why? Everyone in the room is wearing the same style weave or wig, layers and layers of makeup, long false eyelashes, extra-long fingernails and 5 inches of “baby hair” or edges and plumped-up lips. Before anyone gets upset; there is nothing wrong with wearing wigs/weave/hair extensions.
Unglue and unsew and see what you discover. Just try it. You might just love who that person is underneath the false eyelashes, weave, extra-long fingernails, layers of makeup and exaggerated plumped lips. Do you even recognize her anymore. Don’t get me wrong, there is no crime in looking good and feeling good about yourself. All I am saying is when is it too much. Do you spend a small fortune on all the enhancements to still be lonely.
Frustrated and Pretty
Women who refer to themselves as “pretty” are pretty frustrated. Again, I am only addressing the ones who are in the dating game. Despite the things they do, the pretty women feel like the simple, basic looking women are the ones receiving the attention. Possible reasons below may reveal the barrier to meeting that special someone. Think about the things below:
Frame of Mind
Do you have the attitude that you are better than everyone else in the room? If you are attending an event and turn your nose up at everyone else, because you think you are the best looking one there…. Guess again. No one is discounting the fact that you may be attractive, but an attitude like that makes you appear ugly to others. Remember, every person has something unique to offer. Just because you are attractive, does not mean that every man will automatically approach you. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Posture
Are you approachable? Are your face and lips twisted? Do you have your arms folded? Is your back turned? Do you look friendly and smiling? Are you slouching? Body language is an important cue that we sometimes miss and do not think about. If you look like you do not want to be bothered and have a mean look on your face, who will step to you? Think about it for a second. If men are passing you by and going over to other women, take a moment and check your body language and posture.
Set Yourself Apart
Unglue and unsew, remove the false eyelashes and wear your nails short to medium length. Do away with the long edges/baby hair and use lip wear that does not contain plumping ingredients. Why blend in with the same look as everyone else? Do something different so that you do not look like everyone in the place. You would be surprised at how much money and time you can save from paying for that expensive weave and sitting in the salon for hours on end. There are so many styles you can do with your natural hair, no matter how short or long it is. You might even like your natural hair much better.
Worldly
Are you materialistic? Do you don designer apparel from head to toe? The purse cost $800, shoes $250, outfit $400. If you present as someone who is donned in all designer apparel, men may shy away from you. The reason is that they see their pockets getting empty already. Before they speak a word, they know they are going to be broke. You may not be materialistic, but strangers do not know this. The man may see this and think that you are going to drain his money. The saying, ‘not to judge a book by its cover’ comes to mind. Although it is not fair, it happens all the time.
New Things
Give someone other than your usual type a chance. If the type you normally go for approaches you, so be it. Carry on a conversation it doesn’t hurt. Alternatively, try giving the men you normally do not go for a chance. Don’t shoot them down before they can finish the first sentence. You might be surprised at how much you have in common with him and what a deep connection the two of you share together.
Outlook
Try an experiment for two weeks or a month. Unsew and unglue. Reveal the person underneath all the extra stuff. See if any of these changes make a difference in how you feel and/or improve your chances of making that special connection that you are seeking. The simple, plain looking women are looking for that special connection the same as you. Do not be mad at their approach. Find what works best for you.
Full disclosure: I can speak to this because I was guilty of some of these things in the past. I have either experienced these first-hand or have observed these behaviors. And before anyone jumps to conclusions, there is nothing wrong with wigs/weave. I too have wigs and have had my hair braided with added hair. No judgement. The information contained here is to illustrate a point.
Love yourself and all that you are. If you don’t who else will? 
Thank you for reading!
Categories
When We Pray
When We Pray
Prayer is so helpful and freeing. Just know that God answers prayer. We have to also remember that we must prepare to receive our blessings. Work must be done beforehand. Be grateful for the receiving, no matter how long it takes. He is in control.
Thank you all. I appreciate you stopping by to read and/or watch my content.
Continued blessings to all 
Indecent Exposure in the House of Worship
How Did We Get Here
How did we get to the point of indecent exposure in the house of worship? It never used to be this way but as you can see, “times done changed”. But on a serious note, churchgoers should not be exposed to this lack of consideration. We have elderly people attending church and families with small children. Why does Mom have to cover her child’s eyes because a woman is walking down the aisle, half dressed.
We need someone at the door to check for appropriate attire before being allowed admission. Simply to ask people to cover up. I’m not suggesting coming in with a turtleneck sweater and a dress or skirt that is as long as your ankles. All I am saying is to show less skin and cleavage, and not have on see through or tight-fitting clothing.
Indecent Exposure
People attend church services for various reasons, it is plausible to think it is mainly to hear the word, be filled with the spirit, receive their blessing, give tithes/offerings and to be a blessing to others. Right? In some cases, it is true. Some of us have witnessed people using church as a meeting place. A place to meet a romantic partner. Well, ok I can see the appeal of that. Some men feel that good wholesome women can be found at church. Conversely, women feel that they can find a good husband. Yes, this is very possible.
The only caveat is that some women show up at service dressed provocatively, attracting attention. But what kind of attention are they seeking? They may come to church in hopes of finding a husband, but the choice of clothing or lack thereof may deter those would-be husbands. Going about it in this way may have the reverse outcome. Instead, of meeting someone who you can have a long lasting and meaningful relationship with, you may attract the ones only looking for a “good time”, if you get my meaning.
Final Thought
The point I am trying to make is that the house of worship should be free from this kind of behavior. Some of the fashion is down-right disrespectful. If you want to wear tight-fitting and see through clothing and dress in a provocative way, there are plenty of other places for that.
I appreciate you and thank you for reading!
Please let me know your thoughts by leaving a comment or subscribe to receive new content when it is published.
Image by Vincent Ciro from Pixabay
Can You Answer This? What is the Best Decade of Your Life?
Life is a funny thing. It is so unpredictable. It comes with joys, bumps and bruises. We go through ups and downs, but we still manage to continue to live on to see another day. Can you answer this? What is the best decade of your life?
Was it when you were in your 20s, 30s, 40s or beyond? Most people are still figuring things out in their 20s and having fun. Some of us were starting a family in our 20s and some getting married. Education was a front-runner for others, while family took a back seat.
Maybe your 30s was your best decade. Did you meet the love of your life in your 30s. That career you always wanted was front and center and you could not be happier. Reuniting with a long lost relative or friend has changed your life immensely; in a good way of course.
The 40s brought you a mended relationship with someone very special to you. You are now in the home you always dreamed of. Maybe, a goal that you set for yourself has come to fruition and you can be proud of the hard work you put in to obtain that goal.
Wherever life takes you is where you are meant to be. We can try to plot and scheme certain things but ultimately it is up to the creator who is always in control.
As always, thank you for reading!
Image credit: Image by Claude Mondestin from Pixabay
Categories
Breast Cancer Awareness Month
October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Some things you can do would be to get screened by having a Mammogram. Also, perform home self-breast exams. Show you support by being there for loved ones, friends and family. If you choose to make monetary donations to a foundation or organization that is great, too. We can show support by being a listening ear, lending a hand and checking in on those who are diagnosed with breast cancer.
Thank you for watching.
Stay well and be blessed.
How Are You? Awareness Recap
Do you ever stop to check in on yourself? Really think about how you are feeling. The video message highlights a few points to really get you thinking about how to be optimistic and look on the brighter side of things.
As always, thank you for watching! Stay well and be blessed!
Thank you for stopping by to read and watch. Stay well and be blessed.
Nappy and Happy; a Renewed Perspective
Nappy and happy; a renewed perspective describes the sentiments of better health and vitality. The crown, better known as our hair, is something that most women pride themselves about. It is a part of who we are and our identity. Arguably, too much emphasis is sometimes put on hair. Depending on your heritage and upbringing you may agree or disagree on this subject.
Putting hair over health is something that happens often but no one acknowledges that fact. Personally, I have seen many times that physical health/self-care takes a back seat due to not wanting to “sweat one’s hair out”. Sweating your hair out, is not welcome because you invest a lot of money and time into your hair. Why then would you risk messing it up with sweat from physical activity? You know, the kind of activity that is essential to long life and health. Why on earth would anyone want to do that? Crazy right?
Renewed Perspective
If you are someone who has decided to incorporate more physical activity and exercise into your life, you understand the benefits of doing so. Being healthy, feeling good, getting in shape and knowing that exercise/physical self-care is important is a hard pill to swallow for some. The healthier you become the happier you are too.
Personally, I have begun to make self-care a priority, instead of an option. Inconsistency with exercise was the road I travelled. Knowing that life is short, and I have no idea how long I have to be on earth is why I can say that I am nappy and happy. Of course, you can get hair styles that are more friendly with working out and are easy to maintain. For me, I would rather have improved health and vitality than great hair and bad health.
What is your take on great hair versus bad health? Do you feel that we can only have one over the other or both great hair and great health? How do you take care of your crown while maintaining good health?