“Next to trying and winning, the best thing is trying and failing.”
L.M. Montgomery
Trying is the first step to discovery. Discovering your potential and finding out what is possible. Of course, in trying things in life we set out to win. Life does not always work out that way.
Failure, on the other hand is such a great teacher. When we fail at things, we learn how not to do something on the next try. Failing is one of the best ways to learn. It gives us another opportunity at our pursuits in life. We have the chance to rethink and redo our previous attempts.
Winning is what comes out of our previous failed attempts. If we always win, what will we ever learn or how will we ever grow?
Voting season is here. As this election will be coming to a close soon, there was a monumental change in the running. The current president of the United States dropped out of the race for re-election. Consequently, the vice president, has decided to accept the nomination for office. In light of this some people may wonder if they should head to the polls.
Have you ever really stopped to think about the reasons you go to the polling place? Are you someone who thinks, why should I vote? If so, what makes you question the privilege of exercising your vote? Some will say that their one vote does not count and will not matter. If I vote, nothing will change.
Others will say that they vote in every election, it’s just what they do. It’s the American way to vote. It’s my civic duty to go to the polls. Do you feel that by not voting, the entire process will go away, and citizens will no longer be able to vote at all? I’m sure you have heard these sentiments at one time or another.
Numerous reasons will be cited for going to the polls to vote. Why do you vote? Is it a tradition for each election and something you just do. Do you want the free pen, button and sticker that says, “I voted”. Is it that you stand behind a certain candidate and are showing support. Do you cast your vote with the notion that it will make a positive change?
You Decide
It can be said that some people have a better sense of well -being when they participate in the process. Taking advantage of the freedom to vote holds a level of empowerment.
Voting is your way of standing for what you believe in and making your voice heard. The process of voting can positively affect the future of society. While the actual method of the way we hold elections may be flawed there are perks to voting.
I am not asking who you vote for or your political affiliation. I am just posing the question of your reason(s) for heading to the polls. What appeals most to you about the voting process?
August 27th is National Just Because Day. It is day to switch it up and do things, just because. Random acts of kindness are one way to celebrate this day. Do something out of the norm. Be spontaneous. You call the shots. It is a few days away, so put your thinking cap on and come up with things to do on this day.
Ideas to get you started
Send a nice gift or a card to a loved one.
Pay it forward by paying for someone in the line either ahead or behind you.
Treat yourself to something nice that you have been eyeing for a while.
Call a friend or family member just to say hello and see how they are doing.
Spread the word on social media. Let people know about this special day and many people can get in on it. The more the merrier.
Bake a cake from the box mix if you have a sweet tooth. Remember as a child, licking the bowl of batter mix 🙂
Wear mixed matched socks.
Just Because
You get the idea of what this day is all about. So, make it fun and do something just because. Don’t overthink it and do something without any rhyme or reason. You have a few days to plan something if that is what you want to do or just free style it and do what comes to mind on Tuesday, 27th of August.
Got jokes? Show your chops and tell a joke on August 16. Help keep the love and smiles coming by spreading the joy of a joke. Share funny memes or gags on August 16 to celebrate.
Laughter is the best medicine. Today we can make each other laugh and smile by sharing bits of humor. Want to brighten someone’s day by making them smile? Try telling a joke. I’m always up for a good laugh, how about you?
Telling jokes is harder than you might think. Comedians everywhere make it look so easy. Something that you might find funny and get tickled by the next person may not find funny at all. It’s that moment you deliver the punchline, and you hear crickets? After telling your joke, the last thing you want to hear is silence. Instead, go for laughter and smiles. A rupture of laughter, smiles and stomach-holding is the reaction you want to go for.
Personally, I look at the delivery of the joke. Two people can tell the exact same joke but if one of them is very monotone and robot-like and the other is more animated and livelier; usually the more effective delivery method to illicit laughter is the livelier of the two. What do think makes the best way to tell a joke?
Have you ever tried telling a joke and it was a bust? If so, how did you recover from that and how did you change your strategy? Also, do you think someone who has a more serious personally can effectively tell a joke and make others laugh?
Growing up and playing with toys, including dolls is a normal thing. It is fun and it encourages children to use their imagination. Then the child says, Mommy, my doll doesn’t look like me. What do you say to this?
Combing the doll’s hair, changing the clothes, playing with the doll house are all a part of the fun. Don’t forget about the voices we used for each doll as we are playing. The tea parties were also a part of playing with dolls.
Does it matter if the doll kids play with are in the child’s likeness? Some would agree that it does matter that the doll have the same hair style/texture, eye color, facial features and color. On the other hand, people say that it does not matter. A doll is a doll, it is just a toy.
Toys- Teddy bear, doll, books and a ball
There is no right or wrong answer to this question. It is matter of your personal preference. Playing with dolls that both look like you and those that don’t have advantages. It demonstrates that there are dolls that are beautiful in all shapes and colors. The child can experience the likeness of dolls and learn to grow an appreciation for people who are different than they are.
Just like other toys teddy bears, balls, action figures, etc. There is no color coding, it is just a toy. So, what happens when your child says, “Mommy, my doll doesn’t look like me”. An experiment was conducted in the 1940s where kids were asked to choose between a black and white doll. Majority of the children selected the white doll. Associating positive attributes for their selection.
Now, in 2024, we have such a wide array of choice when it comes to dolls. Back in those days there weren’t many options to choose from. You played with the one you were given, no matter if you liked it or not. Also, we live in such a digital world now that children no longer widely play with dolls.
Child Development
Children are sponges and soak up what they see and hear. Playing with dolls gives them that social development they need. They have a chance to act out certain life experiences and it helps them grow, whether they play with other children or while playing alone. Dolls give kids the chance to build their vocabularies, social skills and enhances their imaginations.
Playing with dolls that are not in the same likeness can help them build empathy and understanding of those who are not the same as them. Especially, if a child is in a school that lacks diversity or grows up in a neighborhood where everyone is of the same background. Some children alter their dolls to change the eye color, cut the hair or crayon the skin of the dolls. All in an attempt to make the doll look more like them.
Does it Matter?
What do you think? How important is it that your child play with dolls that are in their likeness. Do you think it plays a big role in their identity and social development? As a child growing up, did you face challenges as it relates to choice of the doll you played with? Lots of questions but again it is all a matter of personal preference.
If you receive a gift certificate to the gym from your husband or wife, how would you react?
A gift is a gift, right? So, it may seem, but if you receive a gift certificate from your loved one to work out, how would you feel? Would you be happy and accept the gift or get upset by the implication. It can go either way. You decide. What’s your response?
August is National Black Business Month. If you are a business owner this may be a good time to look for opportunities to boost your business. During this month consider marketing your business more. Showcase your services or products. Networking with others can give your business that added edge to increase revenue.
The month of August we celebrate and support Black businesses. You can also use this time to encourage aspiring business owners to start their entrepreneurial projects. Sharing and connecting with people who want to start a business is another way to network.
Being a Black business owner does not come easily. It is not all glitz and glamour. The extra work has to be done in order to make it possible to be able to work for yourself. A sense of accomplishment is felt when you can provide a product or service to help people and contribute to the successes of the economy.
Did you know?
The top three places with the highest numbers of Black owned businesses are New York, Atlanta and Washington, D.C.
How do you celebrate National Black Business Month?
You can spread the word about any products or services that you like.
Shop Black owned businesses.
Research about Black entrepreneurs.
It is important because we can encourage these businesses to keep going and continue to contribute to the economic wealth of not only minority communities, but also the world abroad.
The inspiration for this poem is my dear father, may he rest in peace.
Emptiness is creeping in Knowing that missing piece is no longer there Gone Never to return
Until that day Waiting to see Waiting, waiting, just waiting
Time is passing How can I fill the void The void of the man who made me Until that day Still, I wait
When you look at me, what you don’t see The depth My soul Aching Begging for a glimpse of half of me
Nostalgic father
I am nostalgic
Until that day
The other half of me, where does it come from? My slanted, crooked smile, my complexion The Boricua in me, ¿dónde está Papi? In heaven is where you be
Until that day, I wait
My mom instilled in me Black, resilience, humility Black, resilience, humility She is the half of me Empty inside? How can this be?
Nostalgic father
I am nostalgic
Two people came together as one To create me She is her and he is him She is here and he is there
Forever encapsulated in my heart you will remain Thoughts of you never bring feelings of disdain Although my heart is heavy Until that day, until that day That we reunite The anticipation, anticipation brings me pure delight
Sharing a personal experience of speaking in front of a crowd. I challenged myself to perform an original poem about my father. Although, I was not one of the finalists for the talent show. it was a great experience. I learned that you could do anything you put your mind to. Even when you do not take home the prize it is still rewarding just for trying.
Reposting this in light of another tragic and unjustified police shooting of Sonya Massey. A black woman who called police because she thought there was an intruder outside her home. Calling police for help and sadly, she lost her life that day.
Rest in peace, Sonya Massey and countless others who have lost their lives by the hands of police.
Let’s take a minute to bring attention to something that is happening all over the country. African Americans have lost their lives due to police brutality. It does nothing for the officers who honor life and truly believe in the notion to protect and serve. When you see officers on both sides of the coin, how do you discern between the ones who uphold the law and those who do not?
Being in a role of authority, there comes great responsibility. Responsibility to uphold duties for the community in its entirety. More frequently these days this is not the case, the opposite is happening. Basic human rights are being taken away at the hands of people who took an oath to protect and serve. Preserve life, not take it away.
Too many times, certain people take their authoritative position to the extreme. When people see you, they should not fear for their lives. They should have the opposite feeling of comfort and/or safety. When people see you, they should not run away from you. Instead, walk towards you with a general feeling of trust. What happens to the world when the people who are meant to be in place to help others are the real perpetrators!
It is a form of abuse of power. Taking advantage of individuals because you are in a position to temporarily control a situation. Using phrases such as, “I felt that my life was in jeopardy”, as an excuse. An excuse to beat, choke, kneel, shoot, choke and kill another human being. And, why? Because you can. Because you hide behind a piece of metal that you wear on your chest. You escape prosecution because you are upheld by some who wear the same piece of metal.
Protect people, preserve life. That piece of metal does not give you rights to take another’s life. Those people have families, just like you. Some also have children, just like you. They have people who love them and are looking forward to them coming home safely. What kind of protection are you providing when people have to take out their cell phone to record a routine traffic stop? Disrupting people’s lives with your contempt is not acceptable. What happened to trying to restore order by using the least amount of force? Thank you to the officers who help people, who are serving all people. To the ones who are not, shame on you!
Serve All People
As a uniformed person, working under the law. Honor that! Serve the people. Serve us with dignity, respect, kindness. I know there are encounters that you experience where you are not met with kindness. You are trained to handle these situations. This is what you signed up for and are trained to handle such situations in the least harmful way.
I implore you to approach your daily interactions, while on the job with humility. Please, do not wake up and put on that uniform with contempt and hatred for people and your profession. If you find it so hard to go into it with some semblance of humanity, stop and think. Think before you take someone else’s life. Stop and ask yourself if this is the profession for you. We all deserve to live. We all deserve to go home at the end of the day.
Rest in Peace
Let’s take a moment to remember some of the people who lost their lives due to brutality.
Tyre Nichols
George Floyd
Tamir Rice
Eric Garner
Sonya Massey
Walter Scott
Breonna Taylor
Sandra Bland
Philando Castile
What can we do?
Protect and Serve was originally posted on Feb 11, 2023.
Do you ever stop to check in on yourself? Really think about how you are feeling. The video message highlights a few points to really get you thinking about how to be optimistic and look on the brighter side of things.
As always, thank you for watching! Stay well and be blessed!
School will be back in session soon. Are you a parent considering home schooling your child? With the things happening around the world, it seems rational to think about keeping the kids at home to complete their education.
Home schooling gives parents some autonomy when it comes to what their children are learning. Is it easy? Is it for everyone? Should it be the “new normal”.
Education has changed, post covid 19. Remote learning has been implemented more frequently. Some school systems have moved more towards a hybrid learning experience. Both in-person education and remote learning.
Home schooling may look more appealing to some parents who are concerned for their children’s safety. Safety from violence of other students, teacher-student conflicts, bullying and school shootings. Home schooling may be the best option for some families. Unfortunately, it will not work for everyone.
In the working age and rising inflation, parents need to work full time, outside of the home. With growing violence in schools and some states allowing teachers to carry firearms, poses a lot of risks. As a parent, how would you feel letting your child go to school knowing that the teachers are carrying a firearm?
Benefits of Home Schooling
Safety from violent acts at school
More control of what children are learning
Protection from bullying
More conducive environment for the child to learn
Eliminates busing across town for some students
Flexibility with school and life balance
Home schooling cons
Lack of social skills for students
Decreased opportunity to form friendships with their peers
Limited or no access to extracurricular activities; arts, sports, clubs
What is a parent to do? Parents should not have to contemplate whether or not to send their child to school. Or decide how to plan for their child(ren) to receive very basic education.
On the other side of the coin, a part of the problem is disrespectful children. Respect for authority is gone. Children are so brazen and will challenge an adult without a second thought. Some kids these days are armed with weapons themselves.
Teachers nowadays feel vulnerable and question their personal safety. A possible solution is a less lethal one. Instead of firearms maybe carry a taser. This way teachers and school authorities can defend themselves without deadly consequences. Firearms and schools just are not a good mix.
We cannot protect ourselves or our children from everything. What do you feel is a solution?
As always, thank you for reading. Stay well and be blessed.
Growing up was such a fun time. Every family had their challenges but overall, it was a good time to just be a kid. Go outside, play with friends on your block or in your neighborhood. Today’s children are so isolated. The video games and internet have robbed children of social skills.
Back in the day, we played outside. The girls would play double dutch, or we would play with our dolls and tea sets. We would play dress up too. The boys would play football in the street or hand ball, stick ball. Games everyone played together are hide and seek, red light, green light, hopscotch, hot peas and butter, Mother May I.
My favorite childhood games were double dutch and hopscotch. I liked Jacks too. What was your favorite game to play when you were a child?
As always, thank you for taking the time to read. Stay well and be blessed.
Can You Answer This? Is Lack of Eye Contact Narcissistic?
Why don’t you look at me? I’m talking to you.
Eye contact is an essential part of communication. It is a non-verbal way to connect with each other. As vital as it is for effective communication, it is sometimes overlooked. No pun intended. How much importance do you place on the use or lack of eye contact in conversations? Do you prefer people to connect via eye contact or the averted look?
Some people feel uncomfortable making eye contact or when someone looks at them too intently. Shyness is one reason why people may avoid eye contact. I’m sure if you ask around you will get varying reasons of why people prefer not to make eye contact. You may think it is rude or downright disrespectful. Anxiety or nervousness are also causes for this type of avoidance.
Lack of eye contact is a tactic of narcissistic individuals. Not to say that everyone who avoids making eye contact is a narcissist, as there are many reasons for this. It is used to up play the narcissists feelings of importance. By avoiding eye contact while speaking with others shows that they are not interested in making a true connection with the person to whom they are speaking. It makes them feel superior with a thought such as, “I do not need to look at you, I am above you”.
Weigh in on this and share what you feel on this topic.
