Sharing a personal experience of speaking in front of a crowd. I challenged myself to perform an original poem about my father. Although, I was not one of the finalists for the talent show. it was a great experience. I learned that you could do anything you put your mind to. Even when you do not take home the prize it is still rewarding just for trying.
Hope you enjoy and thank you for watching.
If you are ready to drop some ill talk or action on someone, stop and drop some good will or cheer instead. For example, if you are about to say something foul to someone, especially someone that you love or who loves you. Stop and say something nice instead. It can be so easy to take those closest to you for granted. Those closest to us, sometimes do not get the best of us. This is because we figure, I see this person on a daily basis, so I do not have to be on my best behavior or give my all.
If you are going to say something that you know is hurtful to your loved one, give a complement instead. Forget about the argument you just had. Let it be. After you have decided to say something nice and complementary, it will make the other person feel good and you will feel better as well. Try it. What do you have to lose? Ok, I will tell you. By saying something positive about someone, you lose stress and anxiety. Ill feelings that increase cortisol in our bodies. You want to release dopamine and endorphins, the feel-good hormones.
Lose the negativity and grudge feelings. Love rules over everything. Be slow to anger and quick to love. Becoming angry is so easy and that is exactly why we must challenge ourselves. Embrace love and forgiveness.
Happy Father’s Day to all the dads out there. Please know that you are seen and appreciated for all that you contribute and do for your children. The dads who take the responsibility seriously and do what they need to, in support and love of their children. I hope you smile today and every day knowing in your heart that you are special, important, loved, needed and cherished.
Blended families exist and they can be rewarding but also come with some demands. Meaning, that the non-biological parent in the family may face some opposition when trying to discipline a child in the home. The child may feel like they do not have to abide by rules of someone who is not their biological parent. You know how defiant kids can be. So, that brings the question of what the rules are with discipline. Is it okay for a parent other than the biological mother or father to discipline a child?
One thing I think most of us can agree on is that children require discipline. The method of discipline varies greatly and is a personal preference. Nonetheless, it is a necessary part of a child’s growth and development.
Some families are blended, and some are strictly nuclear. As such, it creates a situation where the biological parent is either the mother or father but not both. I pose the question of whether or not it is okay for a man or woman other than the biological parent to discipline the child?
Let’s look at dads who take on the responsibility of another man’s child with his girlfriend or wife. Do you feel that he should have a say in what the child does and whereabouts of the child? Should he be concerned with things relating to household chores, school and extracurricular activities? At the very least, he should feel respected by the child, no matter what. After that I think if he helps support the child, he should be able to apply discipline strategies. Whether that means taking away privileges, punishment where they are restricted from certain activities or getting a beating.
In my opinion, I believe that the parents should come to an agreement and understanding of what that discipline should look like. And stand firmly on that without veering away from those rules. Of course, it will be different for every household but as long as the parents of the house are on the same page, I think it is possible for blended families to work and it can be so rewarding. What do you think?
The countdown is on. Only 1 week left to show those men how much they are appreciated. Do fathers get the credit they deserve? Fathers are very important and sometimes they do not get their deserved credit. People may say that they are supposed to be there for their children and take care of them. Indeed, but why not give them their flowers too?
Afterall, we all want to feel appreciated right? Yes, we do.
In honor of those special men, think about what they mean to you and the role they play in your life. What is special about your father that stands out and makes you want to extoll him? I’m sure you can come up with a few. Thinking about the moments in life that you and your father shared, how can you express your appreciation? Make sure that he knows what those moments mean to you. Additionally, remember to extend that gratitude long after June 16, 2024.
Is there is a memory or time that you most cherish with your father? It would be nice to recreate that moment and relive it all over again. If you cannot physically be with your dad, call him up and reminisce about that memory. I’m sure it would make him smile to know that you remembered it too and cherished the time just the same, if not more.
Dads don’t ask for much, they just want to know that their efforts are not in vain. It is nice to get a ‘thank you’ from someone. It lets them know how much they enjoyed an event or moment spent together. Although, we think they already know how we feel, nonetheless, say it anyway. Even if your dad is not be the sentimental type, and he likes gifts and/or gestures instead. Well, do that. He might want something as simple as watching a sporting event on television. He might want you to just spend time with him. And for the dads who like to receive gifts, make it possible for him. It doesn’t have to be anything extravagant.
Do fathers get the credit they deserve? What are your thoughts on the subject? Leave a comment and share your opinion.
Father’s Day this year, in 2024 is on June 16th. You still have time. Do not forget about this celebration. Fathers are very important and are a much-needed part of society and family. Sometimes, they do not get the recognition and are not celebrated like they should be. There is time to change that.
Also, the month of June is Men’s Health Awareness Month. Urge the men in your life to get a checkup. Even if they feel fine. Some medical conditions do not show up by symptoms and they may feel ok. It is better to be safe than sorry.
Part 1 of the Father’s Day Series is about what qualities make up a good father. A loving man who demonstrates the love of their child, a good listener, the man who shows interest in their child’s goals in life. Discipline and structure are also important.
Is it the one who is there emotionally and physically? The one who listens and talks to their children. The man that attends extracurricular activities. The one who actually spends time with their children.
Or is it the one who provides financially. He is the one who can buy clothes and food. Provide a home. But he is not around. He doesn’t invest time and/or effort. The father who writes the check but is absent otherwise.
What do you think is more important?
Of course, the child’s basic needs should be met. Is it too much to ask that the father provide and be there emotionally?
Fortunately, there are men out there that do just that. It doesn’t matter if the child lives in the same household or not. The man makes an effort to see his children and provides financially too.
June 16th let’s not forget Father’s Day. The day is coming up, there is still time. Show the dads out there that they matter and are loved and appreciated.
Did you talk to yourself today as a reminder of how blessed you are? Tell yourself that no matter what happens you are still here. If you didn’t have the talk yet today, there is still time left.
February is Black History Month. 2024 is a leap year, so we have 29 days to show our pride. Reflect on the contributions of African Americans. Consider where we came from and where we are today.
Alexander Miles created automatic elevator doors. Making for a safer elevator experience by lessening fatalities from people falling down the elevator shaft. Mary Van Brittan Brown co-invented the home security system. A much-needed necessity in the world today, which gives peace of mind, both while at home and away. Other inventions like the ironing board, traffic light, caller I.D. and call waiting are just some of the inventions by the Black community.
February 11, 2024- Kansas City Chiefs vs San Francisco 49ers
February is Heart Awareness Month. Take time to pay attention and watch out for your heart health. Exercise and healthy diet are two ways to maintain health.
Along with heart health, in February there is Black Love Day and Valentines Day. February 13th celebrate Black Love Day with your sweetie and remind them just how much they mean to you. Not only romantically, but also BLD highlights love for the Black community as a whole. Don’t forget about friends and family.
Valentines Day is on February 14. Another way to guard your heart health with displays of affection. Show your love for your partner and include family and friends.
February 7-15 is a week to recognize and celebrate Black women in the arts. This includes movies, art and music. Women are still facing equality issues as it relates to compensation for their talents. Black women are still not being paid in equal amounts like their peers.
Art by African American women is not displayed at exhibits the same way it is for people of other demographics. Women who are performers in music are underpaid in the industry. Even though they have made great strides in this area, it is still not equal to actresses of other nationalities.
If you are interested in learning more, research Black artists. If you have a favorite artist, share with people you know. Another way to support Black female artists is to buy pieces of art by them. Spreading the word is a way to support their contributions and achievements.
Happy Birthday Aquarians and Pisces.
Image Credit: Photo by Elena Mozhvilo on Unsplash
**1/7/24 post updated: The Hannukah celebration by the Jewish community is not widely celebrated due to security reasons. The current state of affairs of the war, in no way is meant to imply that the Jewish community is the cause. My sincerest apologies to every and anyone who may have been offended. **
The time of year is here. The season of celebration, thankfulness, giving, family and reflection. We have all heard of Thanksgiving, Christmas and Kwanzaa. Among those, people also celebrate Diwali and Three Kings Day. I know there are other celebrations being had across the world. Hannukah is a celebration by the Jewish community. Unfortunately, due to the current state of war these may not be celebrated as widely, because of security reasons.
The point I am getting to, is that no matter what part of the country you live, we all have something to celebrate and be thankful for. The world is not perfect but we can all find at least one thing that is worthy of celebration.
Family is a reason to be thankful. We do not always see eye-to-eye and agree on things, but family is a good reason to be thankful. Maybe, this time of year family can bury the hatchet and squash old beefs in the name of renewal for the new year. Release the weight and be free from the hold. You will feel so much better and be glad that you did.
Celebrate health. If you are ambulatory and have full use of your limbs, celebrate that. You might be thinking, so what that’s nothing to celebrate. Just think if you couldn’t walk on your own. Having to depend on others to do for you. You will appreciate the use of those legs to drive a car, go to work, play with your small children. Taking a walk or even exercising.
Love is a reason to celebrate. If you are coupled up, whether you are married or have a boo. Celebrate that love. Whatever that thing is that brought you together, reflect on it and celebrate in your own way.
Every culture has their holiday rituals and traditions. If you are not in a celebratory mood, try to get out of that funk. It won’t be easy but find a reason to smile. If you haven’t been practicing your religion, go back to that. If you haven’t talked to your friends/family in a while, do that. The things that bring a smile to your face and make you feel good inside, revisit that.
Let me not forget the season for giving. It is not always about money. Give someone a smile or a compliment. If someone asks for your advice, give them true and sound advice. Hug yourself and say something nice. If you do participate in giving for the holiday season, give with a whole heart and not expect anything in return.
At a very young age Black girls are taught to be strong. They are also surrounded by examples of this strength. Growing up and watching your sisters, aunties, mother, cousins, etc. holding it down, you get a sense of what it means to be strong. The strength of a Black woman is both a curse and a gift.
At times, this can be crippling when you are struggling with something and need to lean on someone for help. In those moments when we are vulnerable, we were taught not to show it. Just do what you have to do and not let anyone on the outside see that vulnerability.
I want to be clear that when I am talking about the strength of a Black woman it is not to exclude anyone. Simply, that I am speaking from my point of view and experience. I stand in solidarity with all women. My point of view is being told with the utmost respect. However, I cannot speak to the challenges and/or triumphs that other women face. Women of all races experience struggle and face discrimination for different reasons. I am speaking from my reality.
Whether or not you witness strong Black women, life makes you strong. The circumstances in life force you to get it together. No time for crying, no time for thinking about it. Just time to do it! The gift of being a strong Black woman comes at a price though. The gift of strength is what makes you smile when you have conquered those hard knock life moments.
Being blessed enough to be able to bear children is a gift. One that some women take for granted. The birth of a child requires bodily strength. Of course, there are amazing drugs to take off the edge. Also, it requires a certain mental strength. Now you are responsible for another human. You have to nurture and care for the individual that you have carried for all these months. Breastfeeding, waking up at night, school activities, monetary responsibilities, keeping the child safe.
The strength takes over when you only had 2 hours of sleep and its now time to get up for work. Feeding times when your nipple is sore from feeding. Getting up to warm a bottle of formula and preparing, just when your head hit the pillow. Consoling your child when they had a bad day at school. Providing groceries and wondering how to stretch the dollar when rent is due. Strength is also that thing we have on our side when the father of your child is absent, for whatever reason. In those instances, we are the sole provider and have to hold things together. Single motherhood is a thing and that’s when strength plays a big part.
Inner strength is what gets you out of the bed in the morning. Strength makes you power through when you are not feeling well. It is what makes you show up to a minimum wage job. Inner strength keeps you going when you feel like giving up. Being strong is what allows you to deal with less-than-ideal situations. It is what lets you tackle life head on, with no hesitation. Strength is what makes you say, “no” to things that do not serve you.
Being strong is good but at times, it can be bad. It is the same strength that tricks your mind into thinking that you have to do it alone. You are not allowed to seek assistance. When you show up as a strong woman, sometimes people think you can do it all. They judge you and do not think that you need help.
Health concerns get ignored, even when they are legitimate concerns. Healthcare has not been kind to Black women. We know our bodies and know when something is wrong. At times when we take those concerns to a professional, we are made to feel like the problem is non-existent or is not a concern at all. The “brush-off” is what I call it.
In situations where we do reach out for assistance, we hesitate for fear of being judged. Other times, people see that strength and use it to their advantage. Meaning, they figure we can deal with or handle a situation, therefore do not step in to help when it is warranted. There is this unspoken expectation for us to do certain things, no matter what.
So, you see, the strength of a Black woman is a gift and a curse. It comes with a lot of responsibility. Also, it comes with boundless rewards. Cultivate that strength and power and it will be more of a gift than a curse.
The devastation happening in all parts of the world is heavy. I ask that you keep your hearts, mind and prayers up for everyone affected by the recent and ongoing atrocities against mankind.
It is a time for healing. We need peace, love and harmony.
Fathers are such an integral part of the family. We look to them to be the providers and to be the strength as protectors. Besides that, they are people too and as such need to feel appreciated and loved. We often place more emphasis on Mother’s Day, but fathers are important too. On Sunday, let your dad know just how special he is to you.
For years fathers have been caretakers of the family and have really stepped into and embraced this role. Some fathers do not get the recognition they deserve. On Father’s Day, which is usually the 3rd Sunday in June, call your father and all the fathers you know. Wish them blessings for a happy Father’s Day. It will lift them up and make them feel good about their role.
Depending on where you live in the world, there are a myriad of ways to celebrate. Some people give gift cards or buy gifts. Some popular gifts are work tools, ties, car accessories, or grooming products. For the Dads who love to grill out, you can gift some items for the “grill master”.
Another way to celebrate your father or father figure is to spend time with him. Time is something precious that we can never get back and what better way to show your love than to spend some time with Dad.
If it is not physically possible to see your Dad; talk to him in prayer. Remember those favorite things about him that make you smile. Play his favorite song, wear his favorite color, make him a greeting card and keep it in remembrance of him. Whatever you choose to do, make it special.
Image credit: Image by No-longer-here from Pixabay
You are my mom, tried and true You cheer me up, when I am blue When I need a hug, you are there I can turn to you, when it’s too much to bear You take me to the park I can see the dogs play and bark You make me laugh and smile You wear motherhood with much style Thank you for being my mother Your role, invaluable, like no other Have I told you lately? You are loved by me, greatly ---O'Nika McGill---
Have I Told You Lately? is written in response to prompt by Sadje, http://lifeafter50forwomen.com/2023/05/15/what-do-you-see-186-may-15-2023-mothers-day/
Have I Told You Lately? first appeared on Inspire By O’Nika.
April is Couple Appreciation Month. What a better time of year to let love blossom. After all, April is the month when the flowers bloom and so can the love a couple shares with each other. Not to say that when April is over you go back to being “extra” or whatever version of yourself you were all year long. Just joking, just joking. It’s ok to smile. But, you get my meaning.
Being coupled up is a beautiful thing and has its advantages. You get to share a part of your life with someone. All the moments that make you smile, laugh, cry. You get to celebrate each other. Be it for business successes or other personal milestones in life. When you had a not so nice day, you get to be hugged and comforted by your loved one. You get to create memories together.
April is halfway over so if you haven’t been showing appreciation for your “better half”, there is still time left. I would like to think that when the first of May comes, you continue on. Let the appreciation and love flow throughout the year.
Just think about how you felt the last time your partner showed appreciation to you. How did it make you feel? I bet it made you smile and feel loved. Appreciation for your mate is just another extension of your love for that person. Think about something that your partner likes to do or something they enjoy. Make it possible for him/her. Just because. It does not have to be for a special occasion. And do it, without them asking.
Do those things that you haven’t done for a while. Even the ones you can’t talk about out loud; you know those intimate secrets. Go back to your first date or a first for your relationship. Remind your partner of those things that make you smile and the things that you love about them.
Appreciation is in everyone’s budget. There is no excuse. I hear some of you trying to talk yourselves out of this. Just get out of your comfort zone and take the time, take the time; I’ll say again. Take the time. You won’t regret it. Life is short. Enjoy each other.
Hopefully, these items can get you off to a good start. Whatever you do, make it special. Love should be celebrated not just for birthdays, anniversaries, Black Love Day, Valentine’s Day and the like. Every human on this earth needs love. So, show yours in your own unique way and I wish you all a wonderful Couple Appreciation Month.
What is more endearing than a child’s laughter?
Hearing a child laugh is a sound that is so beautiful. It is something that I, for one, would not get tired of hearing. Children are so innocent and pure. Nothing makes the heart smile more than to hear the laughter of children. When I hear a child laugh it makes me feel joy and happiness, right along with them.
Can you answer this? What compares to a child’s laughter?
What do you think?
Audio credit- Sound Effect from Pixabay
Growing your mental Opens minds; developmental Love and consciousness are life’s syllabus The syllabus which teaches us Leading with eyes only Robs the soul and results to lonely Lonely, pretentious and superficial Love and meaning are most beneficial Ask yourself when you look in the mirror Do I manifest what I am seeking? Searching hard for the answer brings you nearer Realizing that arrogance, pride and conceit are what you are reeking Maturity and mental growth Brings us closer to an oath That tells us life is about much more Fulfillment, gratification and enrichment are in store Exit the false prophecy Visualize the hypocrisy Newfound treasures appear before your eyes Things unseen before suddenly materialize Wow, what a surprise! Grow Your Mental first appeared on Inspire By O'Nika, March 22, 2023