Chasing away the chaos. Ever wonder when you turn on the TV if there will be good news? The war in Ukraine is still ongoing. Gun violence is still rampant. Gas prices are on the rise, once again. Food prices are steadily increasing. Housing costs are through the roof. Is there any relief in sight?
The chaos that goes on today poses a question about what to do to find some semblance of calm? One way to chase away the chaos is to stop watching the news. I can’t remember the last time I saw something good on the news. While it is imperative to stay informed about what’s going on, it is also sad and depressing.
Changing the world is no easy task but we can start with changing the way we see things. Look at things in a positive light and focus on that. It is very easy to fall into the negative zone and the gloom and doom takes over. Think of someone who always has something to complain about. Something is always a problem, or they are always, “in their feelings”.
Things may not be sweet all the time but there is always something positive in every situation. In some cases, people choose to focus on the negative aspect. Why is that?
Below is a previous article about inner peace. Maybe it will help with chasing away the chaos in your world. I hope it sheds some light and helps to turn things around for those going through a dark situation.
Independent by choice or force, which are you? Someone who is independent does not rely or count on outside things. An independent person may also be considered self-sufficient. Being independent comes with both positive and negative judgements. Let us look at both sides of the coin.
Independent by choice
I got this Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels
A person who is independent by choice may be seen as egotistical, head-strong, unyielding or even arrogant. People who choose to be independent are those who feel they have something to prove. They have to show others that they can do for themselves without assistance from anyone else. They have it in their mind that if someone helps them, they are weak. Maybe people will see them as incompetent. On the other hand, they may feel like they owe someone who lends a helping hand. Having access to resources but not using them is another way to exhibit being independent by choice. If you have a support system but choose to do everything yourself and not accept help, then this would be a choosey independent.
Independent by force
Mom working at home with the kids Photo by Ketut Subiyanto: on Pexels
Being independent by force is more of a survivalist style of living. If you are independent by force it means that you do not have a support system and have to mostly rely on yourself. There are no close friends or relatives in easy reach that you can call on. In this case, you only have you. It takes a lot to deal with and handle everything that is necessary for everyday life. Especially, if you have medical and/or physical limitations, or are economically strapped for cash.
In some of these cases, people will just give up because they are tired. Mentally and physically exhausted. Even when local resources are available, you may not be able to get to the place to receive services. For example, someone without a car does not have a ride to sign up for services. Some individuals may not have fare to ride public transportation, even if this is available in their area. It is difficult to be in this situation, but some people manage just fine. They have it in their mind that they have to get it done and find a way.
Independence in relationships
Man offering helping hand Photo by Robin Kutesa on Pexels
In relationships, this is a topic that rears its ugly head. Some of our sistas are out here being strong and independent. That’s cool, that is great, but… don’t overdue it and make your man feel that he cannot do for you. I know it can be hard at times to let the wall down and let someone get close to you. This mindset of having the wall up and being independent comes from being a product of your environment, in some cases.
Meaning, we have single mothers taking care of the kids alone. The fathers are not around for whatever reason. Sista’s in relationships with men who are not holding up their end of the relationship. Being a bum and letting the woman carry them. This behavior is enabling and can only have a negative effect on the relationship in the long run.
Holding your own is a wonderful thing and gives you purpose and a feeling that you can do for yourself. Beware, shutting your partner out will cause a divide. Just know that your man wants to feel like a man and be there for you too. Let him in. Let him feel important in the relationship, like he can be there for you, the same way you are for him.
Independent by Choice or Force
Sometimes we can’t help our circumstances. We can only do our best to make sure that we maintain our livelihood. Just remember, there is nothing wrong with asking for help. Especially, if you are in a position to seek assistance from those close to you. We all can use a helping hand at one time or another in life.
On the other hand, there are individuals who do not care to do anything for themselves. They just wait around and if something happens it happens but if not, then oh well. This type of mindset does not make for being a productive person. Life is so short. We have to try our best to make things happen.
Let us be a participant in life and not a spectator.
Hello October! This time of year we see the leaves changing colors. We feel the cooler weather. After all, Fall is here. October brings light to some health concerns and social issues. October is also a good time of year to go through closets and make room for the things we need for the colder weather. Continue reading to see what’s happening this month.
October helps to bring awareness to breast cancer and the people affected by it. Early detection is key in treatment for this health condition. Various health organizations educate about the importance of screening. Also, they provide resources about how and where to obtain mammograms. It may not be the most comfortable thing to discuss with a health care provider, but this exam is very important. Supporting a friend/family member with breast cancer is no easy feat but the internet has information about how to support a loved one who is affected by it. Breast cancer affects both men and women.
Handbags are for everyday use. You can also showcase your style with a handbag. Some people call it a purse or pocketbook (where I come from). They come in many different colors, styles, shapes and sizes. What is your personal style? If you don’t have a favorite bag, maybe you want to buy the one that you have been eyeing for a while. Why not, treat yourself. Today take a minute to show off your favorite handbag on social media.
The second Monday of October is Indigenous Peoples’ Day. A day to commemorate and recognize the history of Native Americans. President Joe Biden made this a holiday in 2021. Currently, only 14 states and D.C. (District of Columbia) recognize this as a holiday. This is a day to stand up and honor their history and culture. The indigenous people have endured atrocities, often omitted from formal teaching in schools. Some ways to learn more are to listen to podcasts, watch on-demand videos and documentaries, visiting a museum that has exhibits about indigenous people and reading books written by indigenous authors.
Global Handwashing Day- Oct 15th
Handwashing Photo by Monstera on Pexels
Handwashing Day is a simple but important concept. Most people wash their hands regularly which helps to prevent the spread of illnesses. Just think about how “germy” everyday things we use are. Remote controls, cell phones, light switches, toilets, steering wheels, elevator buttons and doorknobs. All these things are heavily touched. Therefore, the quick and simple process of washing our hands with soap should not be ignored. Before/after eating are good times to wash hands. After using the bathroom is very important. Before/after preparing a meal are good times to wash hands too. Gastrointestinal and respiratory illnesses can be prevented by washing hands.
The internet has changed the way we communicate with each other. We can instantly stay in touch with people, complete work assignments, and promote our businesses. Keeping in touch with friends and loved ones is easier and more convenient. Another perk that the internet provides is the ability to shop online. This is especially helpful for seniors and people who do not have a car.
Can you remember the days before the internet? People actually called each other on the phone. Now, they just text. Kids played outside with each other and talked to each other, face to face. Imagine that! These days, you can just sit behind your screen and have very little in-person interaction. Although, the internet has created significant benefits it has some downsides too. A couple of things are the significant amount of time wasted using the internet and decreased socialization. You get the idea!
Every year kids and adults alike, get dressed up in costumes. Lots of pumpkins are carved to celebrate this day. Streets are lined with Halloween decorations, like ghosts, witches, black cats, spiders, and bats. On this day, children dress up and go trick-or-treating. Going door to door to collect as much candy as possible. Adults get dressed up and have parties. People even buy costumes for their pets too. What is your favorite Halloween tradition or candy?
Majestic eyes
see many a thing
some of which
makes my heart sing
People take one look at me
they often wonder
is this a fierce beast
or do I see majesty
A big lion with small eyes
eyes that observe much
from a vantage point fit
for the likes of a lion and such
Such beauty in the wild
things that we ignore
slow down, take stock
these things you will flock
Flock to observe these majestic creatures
their imposing size, big mane
mighty roar, intoxicating gaze
among other features
A fierce beast or a big cat
what do you see?
---O'Nika McGill---
Written in response to Sadje's picture prompt #153
The Game of Life; Are You Playing Offense or Defense? Do you live your life on offense or defense? Usually when we hear these two words we think of sports. You play offense when you have the ball, and you play defense when your opponent has the ball. In this post, these two words will refer to your style of living. How you operate in your daily lives.
How do you play your cards in the game of life? Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay
Living Offensively
Living life on offense is when you are always preparing for what is to come. Essentially, you stay ready. You try to anticipate what might happen in the future and get things in order. As we all know, we cannot see what the future holds. We can only try to navigate and guess what things might come up. Living offensively helps to keep the stress down.
Examples
Establish an emergency fund by saving. This enables you to have a safety net for those unexpected occurrences.
Keeping car maintenance up to date.
Servicing the HVAC unit before it breaks down.
Change your passwords often and create strong ones in an attempt to keep accounts safe.
Defensive Living
Alternatively, defensive living is when you react to things that come your way. You are good at rolling with the punches. Handling things on the fly comes easily. Becoming frazzled by the least little thing that happens, is not a concern for those who live this way.
Examples
You have engine trouble due to not performing regular oil changes. Now, you have to take the car in for repair to fix the problem. This causes a small disruption and inconvenience in your travel.
You have to go to the ER. The bill comes in the mail. You have to wait until next paycheck to cover the expense due to not saving. Or you are stressed trying to figure out how to take care of the bill.
The passwords you use are generic and can be easily guessed. Your privacy is violated by an unauthorized third party. Now, you have to scramble to protect your private information.
The Game of Life
The one thing we know about life is that it is uncertain. We can control some things but then there are others that are not within our control. At the moment of truth, when it all goes down is when we tap into our inner self. The choice to take a defensive stance or an offensive one, I think, depends on our personality. Who we are at the core.
There is no right or wrong way to handle these situations that arise. We just have to do it in the way we know best. So, how you livin’ the game of life; are you playing offense or defense?
The Pittsburg Pirates is the team for which he played 18 seasons of major league Baseball. The first Latin-American player to be inducted into the National Baseball Hall of Fame. During the off-season of Baseball, he would deliver food and baseball equipment to those who needed it. Roberto Clemente died at the early age of 38 in a plane crash. This plane crash happened while on the way to help victims of an earthquake in Nicaragua. Not only did he make his mark in Baseball but also he will be remembered as a humanitarian.
Quote- “A nation without heroes is nothing.”Roberto Clemente
Music/Entertainment-Jennifer Lopez– A Puerto Rican singer, dancer and actress.
Jennifer Lopez also called J Lo, has been going strong for many years. She has released music, starred in movies and also was a dancer on the show, In Living Color as one of the Fly Girls. While encompassing motherhood and married life, J Lo has not shied away from her aspirations. Not only has she acted in movies but also produced several of the same. Most recently she has won the Icon Award at the iHeartRadio Music Awards this year. She also has clothing and perfume. Needless to say, Jennifer Lopez is successful in her multi-faceted career. She has many accolades to her name and is a very influential person in the music and movie industries.
Quote- “Doubt is a killer. You just have to know who you are and what you stand for.” Jennifer Lopez
Julia Alvarez writes poems, essays and novels. Her poem, Exile reflects upon the time her family had to run to the United States. In 2013, she received a National Medal of Arts award. This award was presented to Julia Alvarez by president, Barack Obama. The highest award given by the United States government for artists and art patrons. Some of her notable works include, In the Time of the Butterflies, How the Garcia Girls Lost Their Accents and Yo!.
Quote- “A book does not discriminate against anyone. All are welcome to the table of literature.”Julia Alvarez
Politics-Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez– A very visible political figure.
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez was born to Puerto Rican parents in the Bronx, New York. She was on the campaign trail in 2016 with Bernie Sanders. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC) attended the Dakota Access Pipeline protests in North Dakota. Also, AOC was there in support of the Flint, Michigan water crisis. In 2018 she was elected into the House of Representatives. In support of climate change, she has been outspoken and is involved in the Green New Deal. The Green New Deal encompasses the reduction of air and water pollution, addressing wages and union jobs. Creating green jobs and ending use of fossil fuels is the goal.
Quote- “I don’t think any person in America should die because they are too poor to live.”Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez
Can you guess the movie title and/or who the actors are? I will update the post with the answer next week. Put your movie skills to the test. Have fun!
Based on a true story, this movie is about a family. A family, who beat the odds against them. Togetherness, unity and love are what kept this family afloat. Even if you do not aspire to the same professional goals of a trio in this family, you can still relate in some way. For this to be a drama, it will keep you engaged. You will not feel bored with this film. Heart-warming story.
Movie is a drama and based on a true story
This movie has a one-word title
Started streaming in 2022
—Answer—
The movie described is Rise. This is a biographical drama about the family of Giannis Antetokounmpo. Also known as the “Greek Freak”. He is a basketball player for the Milwaukee Bucks. Rise is streaming on Disney+. Starring in Rise are Dayo Okeniyi, Yetide Badaki, Uche Agada and Ral Agada.
Sport your beard on World Beard Day. Whether you wear it neat or let it do its own thing. No matter if your beard is longer or close cut to your face, it’s your day!
Beards have been around for many years. One of the best things about a beard is that you can wear it how you want. Add your own personal touch. Wear it the best way that fits your personality.
You can let it grow naturally, dye it, cut it close. Wear it any length you want. In the winter months, a beard helps to keep you warm. It also provides some skin protection from the sun during the warmer times of year.
Labor Day- September 5th
Labor Day is a day to remember the rights that have been won. The rights for working conditions that are safe, fair working hours, time off from work, etc. People have fought and won rights for the working class. All around the world we celebrate Labor Day by spending time with friends/family. Usually, at a cook-out or picnic, some people use fireworks on this day. Some parts of the world have parades. You might also attend a party in celebration of this day. There is no right or wrong way to commemorate this important day. New York City was the first to hold a parade in support and celebration of their union members and also in recognition of other unions being formed.
National Day of Encouragement- September 12
National Day of Encouragement implores us to encourage people around us. Say a few positive words to those in our lives who may need just that. This day has been around since 2007 and is a way to lift people’s spirits and spread positivity. Spread good cheer. Encouragement can be in the form of words or deeds. Taylor the positivity to the individual person or situation.
Hispanic Heritage Month- Sept 15-Oct 15
Late September into early October is the time of year for recognition of Hispanic Heritage Month. The Latino and Hispanic American community has made many contributions for the betterment of America. Originally, it started out as a week-long celebration in 1968. Two decades later it became a month-long celebration, declared by President Ronald Reagan.
The reason Hispanic Heritage Month starts in the middle of September, is because it coincides with independence of countries like Costa Rica, Nicaragua, Mexico, Chile and others.
We can see the added value in education, music, food, and the entertainment industry. The contributions by the Hispanic and Latino culture go hand-in-hand with the success of America.
National Situational Awareness Day- Sept 26th
National Situational Awareness Day is about personal safety. Being aware of what and who is around you. These days people are consumed with their electronics and are walking with their head down looking at a device. It is important to pay attention. Especially when out alone, do not be distracted. In just a few moments a predator can catch someone in a vulnerable spot.
Things you can do are to walk with your head up. Take inventory of your surroundings. Notice body language of people. Visualize an escape plan. Lock the doors of your car and house behind you. You get the idea. Just be on the lookout for anything or anyone suspicious. Stay woke.
September 11, 2001 was a day of mass casualties and destruction. The United States was attacked by a terrorist group known as al-Qaeda. This act against the country not only changed the landscape of the City but also the landscape of people’s lives.
Compassion is what we need. Not only for people we know and people closest to us. But we must have compassion for everyone. I know it is not easy to do in every situation, but a simple kind word or smile can do wonders.
Movie Time- Guess the Line, Pt. 1 – Image by Jan Alexander on Pixabay
Movie Time- Guess the Line- Pt. 1
I’m going to describe a scene from a movie and give a few hints. Can you guess the movie title and/or who the actors are? I will update the post with the answer next week. Put your movie skills to the test. Have fun!
A cute, little lady gets off the train. She turns around and says to a man, “If you are a real prince, I’ll marry you”.
Movie came out in the late 80s/early 90s
Romantic Comedy
The sequel came out in 2021
—Answer—
Coming To America is the answer. The movie starred Eddie Murphy, Arsenio Hall, Shari Headley and a host of other actors and actresses. The cute, little lady who gets off the train is Birdie M. Hale.
Thank you for guessing and I’ll be back with another movie.
Can You Answer This? Name one of your favorite cartoon characters and tell us why.
Back in the day cartoons were something that most kids looked forward to watching on Saturday mornings. After school was a popular time to watch too.
One of my favorite cartoon characters is Wile E. Coyote. He was a villain, but I admire his tenacity. No matter how many times he was run over, smashed with a boulder, hit in the head and blown up with dynamite; he never gave up!! He had some determination in his quest to catch Road Runner.
Even though Road Runner outsmarted him, Wile E. would plot out his attempts and see them through, no matter what. He didn’t let any obstacle stand in his way! I can’t count how many times he has fallen from a cliff and still came back. He is resilient! Gotta love that. 🙂
Transform your life by taking up a very different job or adapting a new way of life. Re-create is a verb which means that we have to take action. We can’t just sit on our ideas. We have to take action toward our goals. I know you heard the saying, “don’t talk about it, be about it”. It is not easy to start something new. Sometimes we need a little push or some motivation. The good news is that once we act on our vision and ideas, it gets easier every day.
Speaking from experience, it is hard for me to start something new, or just keep up with something that I know I should do. But once I get started it makes it a lot easier to keep going. After I force myself to do something I feel a lot better afterwards. Yes, I said force. Meaning that I went against what my mental was saying at the time and did the physical work.
Re-creating ourselves can come in several forms. We can take on a new hobby, start a business, adapt a new lifestyle, exercise more, eat a healthier diet, and we can elevate ourselves mentally also. Thinking in a different way can change our whole outlook on life.
Start by writing or typing some things that you have been wanting to do but never had a chance to start. Use regular pen and paper, use a note app on your cell phone (tread carefully with this one), use a whiteboard or your computer. Whatever is best and most convenient. The goal is to make it as visible as possible.
Next, think about the things you are good at. Think about your strengths and the things that just come naturally. After that think about the things that you are not so good at and would like to improve. Write it down.
Ask your closest friends and/or relatives to name at least 2 things about you that they think you are good at. By doing this, it may give you some insight as to what direction you want to go.
Re-create by taking on a new hobby
If you are a creative person who likes to make things, a new hobby may be just the thing for you. You might think about making clothes for yourself or other people. If you can draw you might become a tattoo artist. You might even think about painting portraits for people. If photography is your thing, start with that.
This newfound hobby may lead to you starting your own business. The possibilities are endless when you start receiving good feedback about your side hobby and people are liking what you do. Who knows where it might lead! Therefore, don’t wait. Start now.
Photography
Dare to adapt a new lifestyle
Adapting a new lifestyle will take some time but begin slowly. If you want to start exercising more, for example. Start off by walking or using a treadmill or stationary bike. Don’t try to do too much in the beginning. You have to work your way up and increase your activity over time. If you try too much in the beginning, it can cause injury. Also, you might feel frustrated that things are not progressing like you expected. This might lead to you quitting altogether before you even get started. We don’t want that.
Exercise keeps us healthy and helps us live longer. It keeps us out of the doctor’s office, and we are less prone to certain types of illnesses and/or injuries. Along with exercise we can also try to eat better. This is my struggle! I am a junk food junkie!!
Changing our way of thinking
Any action starts with a thought. So, as you can see, how we think dictates what we do. If we just try to see things in a different way and explore things from another angle, we discover so much that we have been missing.
Remember to re-create, if we want a healthier lifestyle. We have to stop saying it and then keep doing the same things. When we fall back into our old habits of not exercising, just remind yourself that this does not lead to the ultimate goal of living a healthy lifestyle. If you come home and sit on the couch or in front of a video game, stop yourself and re-direct. Get off the couch and start moving, doing anything other than sitting on the couch. Alternatively, if you pick up the video game controller, put it back and do something more productive. We have to re-direct our old way of thinking to form new and healthy habits.
In order to improve our diet, we have to do just that. When grocery shopping; don’t load the cart with a bunch of junk food. Try some healthier choices. Even though you might not like fruit, just think how much your body will love it and how much of an improved quality of life you will have. Indulging in a sugary or salty treat is ok, only on occasion. That is of course, if you have the goal to improve your diet.
Sum It Up
Think about it. Write it down. Research your ideas and any equipment you may need to get started. Take Action. Reap the benefits. You get the idea! It all starts with how we think. Making a change is not easy but we can do it! Do not expect immediate results, it takes time. Slow steady progress is better than no progress at all. So, start where you are and be consistent. You will not regret it.
