Keep your hands to yourself people Image by Z RAINEY from Pixabay
Let’s talk about some of the recent incidents where audience members and spectators have let loose on someone on stage or at a sporting event. It is not ok in any form to harass and/or put your hands on someone. Now, if it is self-defense then by all means, throw them hands!
I am talking about the Will Smith slap, the Dave Chappelle attack, the fan harassing Chris Paul’s family at the game and the Mike Tyson airplane incident. It seems like since events started opening up and people are getting out, they forgot their manners and common sense. The country has been on lock down for about 2 plus years due to Covid 19 and now people are acting wild like they lost their mind.
In my opinion, I think the fans in the stands and/or on the floor who harass players and/or their families should be banned from attending the games for at least a year. If you can’t act right and let everyone enjoy the game, then stay at the house. People want to have a good time and not have to deal with your disruption.
And when did it become ok to come up on stage when you out in the audience, FOR ANY REASON!! You were not invited to get on stage so sit down and deal with your feelings after the show. People pay good money to attend these events and there you go, ruining it for everyone.
People sometimes try to provoke and do things to celebrities just to see if they get a rise out of them. Which is what I believe was the case in the Mike Tyson incident. Of course, I wasn’t on the plane. I know, I know… but just leave the man alone when you see he is getting upset or agitated. It’s okay to be a fan but know when to fall back.
If these things keep happening, there will be less public events or they will be on a much smaller scale. Fans will not be allowed at the games but this time, not due to Covid 19 but just bad behavior. It’s not ok people! It’s not okay! Keep your hands to yourself.
We will be back to games with no fans again if people continue with the nonsense Photo by Andre Tan on Unsplash
Security needs to be ramped up in some of these cases. How did the man get the knife into the Dave Chappelle event? People want to feel safe while out and about, just trying to have a good time. Eventually, they will stop going to these shows. Productions will shut down and no one will make money.
What do you think about these recent and past events where people failed to keep their hands to themselves? Or the fans who shout at the players from the stands and audience thinking it’s okay. The players should not be punished if they are being verbally abused by these spectators. What should be the punishment for this type of behavior?
The songs listed here are some of my favorites. I have to say Method Man ft. Mary J Blige, ‘All I Need’ is MY favorite; (the razor sharp version!) That joint is fire, still to this day!
What is your favorite music collaboration? Is it anyone on this list or someone else? There is so much good music out there it is hard to narrow down the list but who do YOU pick as your favorite?
Queen Latifah ft. Monie Love- “Ladies First”
Panjabi MC ft. Jay Z-“Beware of the Boys”
Method Man ft. Mary J. Blige- “All I Need” (Razor sharp version)
Nicki Minaj ft. Eminem-“Roman’s Revenge”
Aaliyah ft. DMX- “Come Back in One Piece”
Marley Marl, Big Daddy Kane, Kool G Rap, Masta Ace, Craig G- “The Symphony”
R&B; what happened to it? Where you at? R&B music was so live back in the day. I’m talking about the 80s and 90s. There were groups and solo artists like Jodeci, TLC (rest in peace Left Eye), Ginuwine, Case, Mary J. Blige. H-Town, Ready For the World, Force M.D.’s, Monica, Usher, 112, Janet Jackson, Silk, Can I get a witness in here?!?! Don’t act like y’all don’t know, lol
Some of the R&B music was mostly in slow tempo but some you could dance to. Even though the music was about love, being in love, breaking up, making up and everything in between everybody could listen to it. You didn’t have to be in love to listen to R&B. You can just sing along to it and play it in your car. Another thing people did while listening to some of these songs is make love. Throw on your favorite R&B song and do “the do”. Don’t act like y’all haven’t done this before. The right song would set the mood and make things right.
Bell Biv DeVoe- When Will I See you Smile Again?
Jodeci- Come and Talk to Me, Feenin’
Keith Sweat- How Deep is your Love
LSG- My Body
Aaliyah (rest in peace)-Back and Forth, One in a Million
TLC- Waterfalls
Boyz II Men- On Bended Knee
New Edition- Mr. Telephone Man, Can You Stand the Rain
Mary J. Blige- My life, Not Gon’ Cry, (I can go on…)
We need some of the R&B groups and solo artists to come back. I know that music groups break up for many different reasons. Some of the members can’t get along. Maybe the music contract is not right. Just many things that come along with the industry. All I’m saying is bring the R&B back.
This month is National Blood Pressure Month. Roll up those sleeves and get your pressure checked! A normal blood pressure reading is around 120/80. Check out this link for more information, May is High Blood Pressure Education Month | NHLBI, NIH
May 5th is Cinco de Mayo- This day marks a day of triumph for the Mexican army over the French army. The Battle of Puebla in 1862 was a day of victory! Celebrations are held all over the world.
8th of May is Mother’s Day- Show Mom how much you care and how much she is loved and appreciated.
We all have those moments when we get bored. There is nothing to watch on TV. You are home alone. Nobody is answering their phone when you try to reach out. What do you do when those moments strike you?
Do you go shopping? Do you eat a carton of ice cream? Maybe you clean the house from top to bottom. Sometimes, you might find yourself starting a new hobby, only to abandon it as soon as your boredom goes away. A walk in the park might be what gets you out of the rut.
Blasting the music at home and dancing gets the blood flowing and helps to boost your mood. I have heard some people say they do intense exercise. Maybe reading a good book will help. Just anything to pass the time will do. What do you do to break the boredom cycle?
There are some constructive things you can do and also destructive behaviors you can engage in.
Constructive
Taking a walk-If you live in an area where you can safely walk, do it! You get some exercise and get to take in some fresh air. Also, you can enjoy the scenery and get off the couch. You might discover that you like walking and make it a new habit
Home organizing– You know that junk drawer that everyone has. Yeah, that one! Try going through it and throwing some things away. Throw those things away that have been there for a while and nobody is going to use. Go through the closets and donate old clothes to the Salvation Army store or Goodwill. It is like therapy to get rid of things. It is a great feeling. Try it.
Destructive
Heavy drinking– We all know the consequences of heavy drinking. If you like to get your drink on, there is nothing wrong with that. But there is a safe way to do it. Know your limits. Please make sure you have a designated driver or call a ride if you are going to the bar. If you live in a place where you can walk, just take a stroll to the bar and/or restaurant.
Impulse shopping– This can be either a good thing or bad thing. If you go out and spend a lot of money for something that you don’t need or later discover you don’t want; this is bad. You might go out and spend “bill money” for something that you just had to have. Well, do you REALLY have to have it or just wanted it? You know the answer.
On the other hand, if you spent money on something that you will actually use and something that you need, then maybe this boredom spell was a blessing in disguise. It helped you make the decision on this purchase.
Gun violence continues to be a problem in this country. It is senseless killing and the loss of innocent lives that really makes the problem such a sore subject. Everyone has the right to bear arms and protect themselves and their families. The use of guns for robbing, stealing and inflicting harm on others is the ugly side of it all. It is sad when children are the victims of stray bullets, or anyone for that matter. How do you protect your children when they are home in their bed and struck by random bullets? Even if the child pulls through it changes the course of their lives forever.
Gun violence begs the question, how do you protect yourself and your children from being shot? It is not something you want to think about on a daily basis as you try to go about your life, but it is very real. Especially, when you are at home and a stray bullet comes through the walls or windows. You go to your car in the morning and its shot up with bullet holes. All you have to do is walk down the street and catch one just for being at the wrong place at the wrong time.
In my line of work, I regularly see the faces of these young children and teens who sustain gun shot wounds. It makes no sense that their lives are FOREVER changed due to gun violence. Some of them are now confined to a wheelchair, some are on crutches for a while, some are still able to walk. Depending on what organs were damaged will determine how much of their lives they get to enjoy from now on. Some unfortunately did not survive the violence by a gun. I just think to myself that this can be my child. Bullets don’t have names.
Guns In School
You ever wonder why kids are packing guns with their lunch these days? I know that some kids don’t have lunch; but they have a gun in their bookbag. It makes you wonder; if a child is bringing a firearm to school, is it because they are being bullied. Also, I wonder where they got the gun from. Maybe they are just showing off to their friends in an effort to fit in. Is the student involved in a gang? Whatever the reason, it makes me wonder what is wrong with this world. Why would a child feel the need to bring a weapon to school? Whatever the reason is, it has to stop.
So should the answer be to install metal detectors at school? Maybe make the kids carry clear bookbags so that the contents are visible while at school? We all know that there are too many politics involved to actually make this a reality. And even if it did happen, would it make a difference? Is it enough?
Senseless Acts of Violence
Being shot over a gas pump at the gas station is not enough reason to justify a life being lost. Accidentally, stepping on someone’s sneaker is not a reason to be shot. Sitting on your porch or being in front of your building, minding your own business is not a reason to be shot. Brushing up against someone in a crowded room, is not a reason to kill someone.
Believe it or not, it happens more often than you think. There is no regard for life these days. Over the past two years, we have already lost and continue to lose people every day due to Covid-19 and then we add the number of people being killed by guns. Sometimes you don’t want to go out and enjoy life because something might pop off out of nowhere, and over something so small. It is not a good idea to live life afraid to go certain places, but it is a reality for some people.
Drive by Shootings
When drive by shootings happen a lot of times people who have nothing to do with the beef get hurt. An unfortunate fact but something we live with in this world. Consider yourself lucky if you haven’t been a victim of gun violence. The people who commit these crimes have no regard for who else will be affected by whatever drama they have going on. Usually, it is over something trifling, like whose block they on and all the other nonsense.
Road Rage
Everyone is in such a rush these days. Some are just plain rude and like to cut people off on the road because they think they can. It makes no sense to shoot someone because you think they stole your parking space. Maybe they were driving too slow and they wanted you out of the way. People, slow down!! Where ever you are going will still be there when you arrive. The goal is to arrive in one piece.
You may have looked at someone too long or in the wrong way and that person took offense. The next thing you know, you are minding your business at work and you get shot for something that was misinterpreted by the person who shot you. It has happened, this is not made up. People are so much in their feelings about small things and therefore just looking for a reason to jump. Why?! Get over yourself and just drive your car man! If I’m driving too slow, go around me. If I mistakenly cut over into your lane, I’m sorry, I didn’t see you.
Conclusion
In my opinion, you shouldn’t have to worry about your child coming home from school. Wondering if they are going to make it through the day at school. They are there to learn but it seems that they have their safety to worry about too. What happened to worrying about if you are going to do well on a test? If you made it on the sports team or into a club at school? Now, you have to watch your back and hope nobody tests you in ways other than academically.
Do we need to equip everyone with bullet proof vests? Are all the stores going to install plexiglass? Maybe businesses will install metal detectors for all patrons coming into their establishment. Better or newer gun laws might help. Harder punishment for perpetrators of gun violence? More education about the proper use of guns might help to prevent accidental discharges. I’m not sure what the answer is but something has to change.
With all the airbrushing we see in magazines and online., there is a lot of pressure to try to look like these “unrealistic” images. Just use what you have naturally. There is nothing wrong with just being you. Sometimes we do too much in an effort to fit in. Come with me on this comical but true journey about some of the cosmetic changes we make. I know you will smile or laugh at yourself at least once. If none of these apply to you, at least you know someone who fits the description.
Eye Lashes
Left- Natural lashes Right- Extra-long falsies
Lashes, lashes and more lashes, you know who you are. Let’s talk about these extra-long eye lashes. Just one question; why? Are you looking for shade for your face? Why do your lashes need to be this long? I know you can’t wear sunglasses or any kind of eyewear with these long lashes. Don’t get me wrong, it’s nice to have full lashes. But…when your eye lashes look like you have a caterpillar or roach on your eye lids, that ain’t cute! Stop it with these extra- long lashes, it’s too much. You are going to mess around and get those lashes caught in something then what are you going to do? We don’t need those problems.
Brows
Nicely shaped brows
On top of having full lashes, it is nice to have a neatly shaped brow. There are a few ways to get them into the shape you want to fit your face. Please remember that you DO NOT want to have the surprised look on your face. You know, when the brows are arched so high that you look surprised all the time… Come on now, admit that at least once you arched your brows too high. Tell the truth! But seriously, arch the brows but not so much so that you look like you are in amazement all day, every day.
Lips
If you have lips that are thin and you want them to look fuller, just try lipstick that has “plumper” added. There are a lot of shades on the market these days. But, when you get your lips injected with filler and your lips are abnormally big for your face; Houston we have a problem! You want your lips to look natural, not like they are swollen and you can stick a pin in them and they will deflate. Or so big that it looks like you had an allergic reaction to something. Also, when applying clear lip gloss; don’t put on so much that it looks like you stuck your face in a bucket of greasy chicken! Just use enough to cover the surface for moisturization. Remember, less is more.
THIS IS NOT THE LOOK YOU WANT
Butt
Now, some of us have a butt and some of us don’t. It’s okay. If you need a little extra cushion or padding, you can always buy butt pads. They look like a girdle but have the padding sewn into the butt area. It’s the same concept of a padded bra. The benefit of wearing butt pads is that you won’t need surgery to achieve the look you want. On the other hand, if you get butt injections to make your back side look bigger, be weary! Some people get too much and it looks so unnatural. If the rest of your body is not proportionate to the size of your butt, it will not look right. Just keep that in mind.
Fingernails
Left- Workable length Right- A little long, claw-like
Nails, nails and more nails. Whether you wear your natural nails, acrylic, gel or press-ons, let’s not get out of hand with the length. The nails are so long that they start to curl under or the press-ons are so long you can’t do certain things. It doesn’t matter how nicely the nails are painted with the colors and designs. You can still have the same look but with a length that is workable. The longer the nails the more germs get under the nail beds. It also makes it harder to perform regular hygienic tasks.
Beauty is important but let’s not sacrifice our health with the unhealthy fillers and injections we get for bigger lips and a bigger butt. The pressure is real, but it is not worth the harmful effects it can have on us later on. What do you say on the subject?
Check out Tha Du-Ja Show. This episode is about Mental Health.
Congratulations to Duquan Hicks and Aa-son Jasim for 1 year of their awareness podcast. Keep it up and much success to you both!!
Some of the topics they have covered include social injustice, dating, an interview with DJ Shakim, loose conversation, and the latest episode on Mental Health. Check out their YouTube channel, Tha Du-Ja Show to see other episodes. Enjoy!
What is the favorite thing you like about your hometown? Is it the people, music, energy, food or general overall feeling of home?
City people might say that they love the energy of their city, with all the hustle and bustle. On the other hand, if you are from the country or more rural area people might say that they like the peace and quiet of the environment. What is your take on what you like most about your hometown?
It’s time for us to check some health exams off of the list. If we don’t take care of ourselves we certainly can’t take care of everything else in life. Being a woman comes with a lot of responsibility. We owe it to ourselves to make sure that we both look and feel good. Kids, family, career, spouse/significant other are all very demanding. We can handle it though. It’s not easy but we can do it. We have days when we might not feel up to it and that is ok. But, keeping up on our health is important. If we don’t feel well it affects our quality of life.
Physical Exam
A yearly physical exam is usually performed at your primary care physician’s office. The doctor will check your vitals, blood pressure, pulse, and listen to your chest through the stethoscope. Also, they check your ears and eyes as well. Some PCPs will perform a breast exam, if you request it. At the physical the doctor will ask you general health questions about any medical family history of certain illnesses. This helps the provider assess your risk of developing health issues. Also, blood tests and/or urine tests will be done at this visit.
Why get a physical exam?
It helps to find out if there are medical issues that need to be addressed. You can learn things about your body like whether or not you are anemic, in which case you might need to take some kind of iron supplements or get the needed iron from food. You might have high blood pressure or maybe your blood sugar is too high or low. Just simple blood tests can help you determine if your cholesterol is too high. This testing can also detect any problems with your kidneys. After learning what your blood results are you can start to take steps to improve your health.
Depending on what the results show it may be a matter of changing your diet and/or exercise. Some conditions may require medication. But having these yearly physical exams keeps you informed about your health.
Breast health is very important for women. A mammogram is a radiology test that takes images of your breast tissue. It can detect whether you have healthy breast tissue or breast cancer. The actual test is not the most comfortable but at least, in most cases, you only have to have a mammogram once a year. Your healthcare provider can specify how often you will need to have this performed.
If you notice any changes in your breasts, like their appearance or the way they feel, it is worth it to get checked out. Self-breast exams at home are important too. This way you know what is normal for you and if something feels off, you will be able to recognize it.
A gynecology exam is a pelvic exam to look at the reproductive organs. The exam can help to detect cancers like ovarian cancer or cervical cancer. Also, the gynecologist can visually look for any signs of thinning/thickening of the uterine lining. The vulva, vagina, uterus and cervix are the areas that will be examined. The provider can also see if you have fibroid tumors and/or any other abnormalities., like a cyst on the ovaries. A breast exam is also included in most gynecology exams. During this exam, a PAP smear is performed and sent to the lab. Usually, a gynecology exam is performed yearly and PAP smears done every 3 years, if normal. A PAP smear looks for any abnormal cells of the cervix.
Having a gynecology exam can be uncomfortable because a stranger is looking at the most intimate parts of your body. The reason it is important is for early detection of any serious illness. The sooner a potential problem is found, the sooner treatment can begin, if needed.
Eye Exam
For obvious reasons, eye exams are important. Good vision is essential if we are going to carry on in our day-to-day activities. Certain health conditions have an effect on our vision, so even more reason to have your eyes checked. Diabetes, high blood pressure, liver disease, sickle cell disease and shingles all play a part in how our eyes function. There are other factors too that contribute to poor eye health.
Malnutrition can also cause problems. If we are not eating right and getting the proper nutrients we need, it affects our overall health. Without the proper vitamins and minerals that we get from food, over time puts us at risk for developing macular degeneration.
Oral health is important. Especially, if you are a happy person and you like to smile a lot. You want your smile to be bright. Also, you want to have a healthy mouth and fresh breath. Routine dental exams are where we can start. Regular dental cleanings can detect any problems, like cavities, periodontal disease or maybe you have teeth that overlap and need braces.
We have all heard it; brushing at least twice a day, and flossing daily is the minimum we should do. Just pause and think about how often we actually floss… Brushing does not get all the “bad” things we need to reach between teeth. Flossing is a very important step but many of us skip this part or don’t do it as often as we should. I admit; I am one of these people.
If you notice swollen or red gums, bad breath, bleeding gums, these are all signs that something needs attention. Our oral health, if left unchecked can have negative consequences on our health. Inflammation in the mouth can let bacteria into the bloodstream and can lead to inflammation in other parts of the body. There is a correlation between gum disease and diabetes, heart conditions and respiratory problems.
You Matter
We only have one life to live so let’s make it a great one! In recognition of Women’s History Month, let’s do something for ourselves and keep our health in check. Now, if you are already up on all of these things, then you are definitely ahead of the game. Keep it up!
March is Women’s History Month and with that in mind, what woman would you say is an inspiration to you?
I’m going to be a little biased in my answer. My mother inspires me. She is understanding, kind, and strong. The love that she has shown over the years is why she inspires me. Just the lessons that she has taught me growing up and watching how she conducts herself. She has taught me a lot and her wisdom has shaped me into the woman I am today.
There are a lot of women who inspire me but too many to name.They have set an example of what is possible. I have highlighted a few.
Kamala Harris
Vice President of the United States. She is the first woman VP, also the first African American woman and South Asian woman to hold this office. If you have political aspirations, just look at what she has achieved. And know that it is possible for you too.
Serena Williams
Tennis star who started at a young age. She kept on keeping on even when people doubted her abilities. She speaks out about gender pay equality and racial equality as well. Her fearlessness is an inspiration to me.
Simone Biles
Gymnast who has won numerous world championship gold medals. Outside of her athletic abilities, she has partnered with Mattress Firm Foster Kids. This is a charity that helps kids in foster care. Simone Biles, in spite of being diagnosed with ADHD was able to persevere. Just goes to show that we all have something to deal with in life, but we must not let it hold us back.
Michelle Obama
Former First Lady. She is not afraid to let her truth show, even with the country watching her under a microscope. Also, her mission to help prevent obesity in children. Her initiative, Let’s Move focuses on physical activity and healthy eating in an effort to fight childhood obesity. Our children are the future, so what a better way to ensure that they grow up healthy.
Oprah Winfrey
Business woman, humanitarian and philanthropist. She implemented a school in South Africa for girls. She has won 2 humanitarian awards in 2002 and 2011. Oprah Winfrey has influenced people all over the world with her talk show and her various projects in show business.
Look at the wonderful things that women of the world can achieve!! Who would you name as your inspiration?
October is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month. The theme for 2023 is Every1KnowsSome1. People in our lives may be in a domestic situation and we might not be aware of it. The situation is not evident, but DV happens more often than we think.
I would like to highlight a very serious and sensitive topic. Domestic violence, also called intimate partner violence. If you or someone you know is in an abusive situation, please consider getting help! Do not suffer in silence.
Know the signs
If you are being put down or called names and insulted
Partner tries to stop or discourage you from seeing friends and/or relatives. Doesn’t want you to go to work or school
Shows physical violence by hurting you, your children or pets in the home
Partner is possessive and always makes accusations of you being unfaithful
Apologizes for their bad behavior and says it won’t happen again
Tries to control what you wear and where you go
Please see the number and link for more information.
Behind the Screen of the Electronic Age (Audio only)
Once upon a time kids played outside. What happened to the days when kids talked to each other and made friends? The electronic age happened. The computer screen, tablet, cell phone screens all came into play. Back in the day, they didn’t have to know each other in order to play a game of hide and seek, jump rope, dodgeball, hopscotch, hand ball and the all the other games kids played. Since the internet and the electronic age, there is a lot less socialization. As a result, children have become too reliant on cell phones, tablets, computers and video games for their entertainment and socialization.
Everyone is behind a screen browsing the internet, watching videos and/or movies, texting or playing video games. No one talks to each other anymore face to face. It is crazy how you can have a room full of people sitting together but they are not talking to each other. Everyone has some kind of device in their hand staring at a screen. Not to mention people walking in the street looking like zombies with their phone in hand not looking where they are going. It’s dangerous, very dangerous!
Video Games
Video games provide some form of entertainment for kids. Kids need some kind of outlet. The problem comes in when they are on the game for hours on end. It is up to parents to limit the time spent playing these games. It hurts their vision the longer they use the game. It makes kids sit for long periods of time. As a result, they are not getting any physical activity. It lessens time spent in the real world talking and socializing in person.
The internet allows for accessing information quickly. No need to get in the car to go to the library to check out a book or look up something in an encyclopedia. Children can research information needed for homework and other school projects. The dark side to the internet is that there is so much information out there it is easy for kids to see inappropriate content. Just a few keystrokes and kids can be exposed to things that are not age appropriate.
Social Media
Social media, just like anything else on the internet has changed. In some ways for good and some ways bad. The good part of social media is that you can stay in contact with people who are across the country from you. You can find long lost relatives and friends without doing a lot of leg work.
Social media is also a good way to advertise your business. If you are a business owner, it is a great marketing tool. It is a lot faster than word of mouth advertising.
Social media is also a place where you can showcase your personal skills. If you have a hobby and create things in your spare time, what a better place to show that. You might be good at sewing and like to make clothes. Maybe you like to put outfits together and give people inspiration. You may be a good singer and want to post videos of yourself singing songs that you wrote.
You name it and you can do it on social media. There are so many platforms. Just keep in mind that there will be critics. When you put yourself out there, the critics will come. And, it’s ok. It’s ok because no matter who you are or what you do, there are always people hiding behind the screen. In my opinion, don’t write something about someone that you are not willing to say to their face. If you can’t say it in person, don’t write it.
Conclusion
The electronic age has made things easier for everyone. It is not all bad. You can accomplish a lot of things without leaving the house. It only gets problematic when too much time is spent staring at a screen. Especially, children who are so easily influenced. We need to be mindful and very watchful of what children view online.
The more time kids spend behind the screen, the less physical activity they get. This can result in them becoming overweight. They will lose much needed socialization skills the more time they are sitting on their computer and/or cell phones.
What can we do to get back to people and strike a balance between screen time and face to face interaction?
